Canada Geese vs. Wooden Dogs

Over the weekend, a mysterious pack of wooden dogs was observed in Edgewater's Veteran's Field. They evidently were placed there to scare the geese whose presence on the field angers some residents. I decided to camp out and observe whether the phony dogs had any effect on the geese.


"Whoa!" - said the first goose to walk up from the beach. "Prepare to do battle, sinister-looking canine!"


"Wait a minute," said the goose. "There's something funny about that dog."


"Hey," the goose noted. "I've never seen a dog attached to the ground by a stainless steel pole before. That's one dog that definitely won't hunt!"


"It's OK, you guys," said the lead goose. "Don't pay that phony canine any mind. Advance ho!"


And so the geese marched on, believing that they, as much as any self-respecting Edgewater resident, have a God-given right to use the field.